The most elegant dinner I’ve ever been a part of had to be in Auburn, Ala., in the 1970s. I remember the table.

A native Parisian set it. She was married to my favorite French professor, who was Polish. There were fresh flowers from her yard. The tablecloth was a midnight blue, and the dishes plain, white Corelle, the inexpensive kind you can buy at the discount store.

Along with the pleasant night and good meal came this revelation: Elegance has nothing to do with high-priced china or expensive silverware or anything that can be bought. The key was in the simplicity, a...

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