By Dalia Colon

The Associated Press

The thought of getting married is supposed to make you hear wedding bells. But these days, it may sound more like cha-CHING!

With the average nuptials costing upward of $20,000, eloping may seem like your only option. But you can have a dream wedding without the nightmare price tag. Here are some painless ways to save.

- Planning: Don’t be sucked into the wedding-magazine culture by starting to believe it’s normal to spend thousands on a dress, accessories and whatever else they say is a must-have. For example, the bridal purse. No one needs a purse at her wedding. That’s why you have bridesmaids. Or outrageously priced shoes. No one sees them, and by the end of the reception, you’ll likely be dancing in ballet slippers anyway.

- Prioritize: Let yourself, your fiance and both sets of parents chime in on what’s most important, and allow yourself to splurge in those areas. For everything else, stick to the budget. All those “this is my wedding, I have to have this” purchases add up, so don’t buy on emotion.

Weigh time versus cost when it comes to DIY projects. It may be quick to decorate the ring bearer’s pillow and flower girl’s basket, but making crepe-paper flower bouquets for the entire wedding party? You may be better off using the extra time to have a date night with your husband-to-be.

A quality wedding planner can save you time and money. It’s her job to stick to your budget. But before you invest, check references. Ask couples who have already had their wedding for recommendations.

The cheapest way to cut costs is to trim your guest list. Don’t plan the wedding as a family reunion; this will save you money and stress. Instead, invite your closest relatives and have a barbecue “reception” for the rest. Along the same lines, if someone does not have a longtime significant other, then do not include the words “and guest” on the invitation.

- Vendors: If the photographers in your area seem expensive, look elsewhere. Even with the travel fee, you could come out ahead.

Scour Craigslist for vendors, provided you check references. Many budding DJs and photographers are willing to work for low wages to get their portfolio rolling.

Get a Photoshop-savvy friend to design your invitations, programs and place cards as his gift to you. Buy some inexpensive card stock and print them yourself.

Read all vendor contracts before signing. If something doesn’t make sense, call. Legalese can cost you big bucks.

Or, skip the photographer altogether and have guests upload their pics to a photo-sharing site like Flickr or Shutterfly.

Buy real flowers for your bouquet and the groom’s boutonniere, and let the rest of the wedding party use silk flowers.

Talk with family members and friends about your vendor needs. If you’re looking for a violinist, tell everyone you know. Include a query in your e-mail signature. Post it on Facebook. Tweet. Word of mouth leads to reliable service, and if you snag a friend of a friend, she’ll likely give you a discount or throw in a free sonata during cocktail hour.

- Clothing: Try on all the dresses you want in a froufrou boutique, but when it’s time to buy, find a lower-priced designer knockoff.

For your flower girl, buy a first Communion gown from Burlington Coat Factory for less than $50. Nordstrom, J. Crew and even Target sell wedding dresses on their Web sites. Obridal.com offers expensive-looking veils for as little as $14.

Use your “something borrowed” to eliminate an expense—say, a girlfriend’s white shoes, the veil your mom wore when she walked down the aisle or your grandmother’s pearl necklace.

Do your own makeup. Go for a free makeover at a mall makeup counter, get the sales person to teach you how to apply it and buy only priority items, like foundation. For the rest, purchase trial-size containers from a drugstore. Not only will you save money, but the smaller size will make it easier to do touch-ups on your big day.

n Reception: Schedule it for mid-morning or late afternoon, so you can get away with serving hors d’oeuvres and cake instead of a full meal. People also tend to drink less alcohol earlier in the day.

Have the reception and ceremony in the same place. You might get a discount, and you won’t have to worry about getting a limo.

Opt for something cheap for favors, like candy, or skip the favors altogether. Many guests leave favors on the table or trash them when they get home.

Use non-floral centerpieces, such as pinecones, Christmas ornaments, shells or floating candles.

For centerpieces and table decorations, stick to things you can use again in your “real” life, such as place mats and serving dishes.

Scripps Howard News Service