On the campaign trail: Some surreal scenes in Iowa

It's increasingly feeling as if Iowa is the subject of some grand social experiment that's being secretly recorded to find out how much absurdity people will take before we realize we're being pranked.

By last Tuesday, I was almost sure of it. That was when Donald Trump received the endorsement of Sarah Palin on the campus of Iowa State University. In a rambling, 21-minute diatribe, she greeted Iowa mothers with a reference to a horror film-"You with the hands that rock the cradle!"-and seemed to sometimes forget on whose behalf she was there. She lavished praise on Trump's opponent, Rand Paul, "because he knows you only go to war if you're determined to win the war," and declared more than once that she, Palin, was in it to win it-"because we believe in America, and we love our freedom, and if you love your freedom, thank a vet."

When she did focus on Trump, she gushed, "he builds things, he builds big things, things that touch the sky."

Palin jumped so often between topics without completing a sentence that if you weren't questioning her sobriety, you had to be questioning your own.

This being a democracy, anyone who gets enough money and signatures can run for office, and even wild cards with high profiles but little to no political experience can win. Remember the governors-wrestler Jesse Ventura and body-building action star Arnold Schwarzenegger? And because reporters are obligated not to pass judgment in covering campaigns, they can inadvertently end up shielding politicians from their own bizarre words.

The press struggled to string together a couple of coherent phrases out of a litany of Palin non-sequiturs. Because to quote her straight would mean reporting something like:

The former Alaska governor had harsh words for the president. "And he, who would negotiate deals, kind of with the skills of a community organizer maybe organizing a neighborhood tea," she said, "well, he deciding that, 'No, America would apologize' as part of the deal, as the enemy sends a message to the rest of the world that they capture and we kowtow, and we apologize, and then, we bend over and say, 'Thank you, enemy.'"

USA Today chose to paraphrase:

"Donald Trump picked up the endorsement of one of the biggest names in the Republican Party on Tuesday, as Sarah Palin announced she was backing the billionaire real estate developer in the GOP presidential race. 'Are you ready to make America great again?' Palin exhorted a crowd at an Iowa rally, invoking Trump's campaign slogan. Palin cited Trump's readiness to be commander in chief and blasted President Obama."

It didn't quote her saying, "Are you ready for a commander-in-chief who will let our warriors do their job and go kick ISIS' ass?"

One Republican who heard the speech, Meghan McCain, told a reporter, "This is not my style of politics, using sort of vulgar language." The daughter of Sen. John McCain had other reasons to be turned off by Palin's endorsement of Trump. This is the man who, referring to McCain's five years as a prisoner of war in Vietnam, said he was no war hero because he was captured. "I like people who weren't captured," Trump declared.

Ironically, picking Palin as his running mate is likely what cost McCain the 2008 election. He either did a poor job of vetting her or was knowingly prepared to leave Americans a heartbeat away from a leader for whom foreign policy experience meant being able to see Russian land from Alaska. She since has become a tea party darling who now accuses the Republican Party establishment of providing a blank check for Obamacare, Planned Parenthood and illegal immigration. "They've been wearing a, this, political correctness kind of like a suicide vest," she said of "establishment" candidates.

The party of Charles Grassley politically correct?

So what does it mean for Trump to get a Palin endorsement? In introducing her, he called her "a person who I've known for a long time, who I've respected for so long. An incredible husband, an incredible family and somebody that when I heard she was going to endorse me, I was so honored. You have no idea how honored. Special, special person."

But even as Trump was lauding Palin's incredible family, Palin's son was facing charges of domestic violence-for which she has managed to blame President Barack Obama. Track Palin is a vet who returned hardened, she said; the president doesn't respect veterans.

Special in what ways, incredible for what, Trump never said. But then he never really says. He talks tough against certain groups, attacks even his friends and promises things he couldn't deliver, like getting Mexico to build a wall with the U.S. And that resonates with people who think minorities are taking over the country and America needs to show who's who by kicking some ass abroad.

The irony for those on the left who loathe Trump's bluster is that he probably wouldn't govern as far to the right as many of the Republicans running. He doesn't seem wedded to any particular set of beliefs, other than those that can give him what he wants.

So here we are, kicking off the next presidential selection with a couple of reality-TV stars using choppy sentences and mangled metaphors: Hands that rock the cradle. Political correctness like a suicide vest. Obamacare-loving Republicans.

Truth really is stranger than fiction sometimes.

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