WASHINGTON-Dear foreign leader,
So, you are considering visiting President Donald Trump at the White House. What an amazing, tremendous, incredible, huge honor!
But tread carefully. Very carefully.
Consider poor Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe.
Trump ripped up the Trans-Pacific Partnership trade agreement, so Abe hurried to Washington to make sure the vital U.S.-Japan trade alliance was not in jeopardy. Japan is our fourth-largest trading partner.
Once again, Abe found himself in a room with the president's daughter Ivanka, who apparently isn't running her business anymore but is eager to have her jewelry, shoes and clothing sold more widely in Japan. And then, suddenly, Abe found himself at a stranger's wedding in Florida with Trump, who was busy pooh-poohing classified information about the significance of the crazy North Korean leader's launch of a missile aimed in Japan's direction.
Earlier, British Prime Minister Teresa May-ignoring political advisers of hers worried about Trump's unpopularity in England-scurried across the Atlantic to meet Trump and shore up the Special Relationship and talk trade.
And then, in the name of national security, Trump signed a temporary ban against immigrants from seven mostly Muslim countries and refugees from Syria and elsewhere, causing total chaos and prompting much courtroom drama.
Then we found out Trump's now-former national security adviser, who lasted three weeks on the job, had pre-emptively assured the Russians they had a friend in him, lied to the vice president about it and, consequently, exposed himself to being blackmailed by Russia. So much for national security!
Justin Trudeau, the Canadian prime minister, flew down to Washington to speak with Trump about plans to renegotiate the North American Free Trade Agreement. Canada is America's second-biggest trading partner. Trudeau found himself before TV cameras in a meeting with women who own small businesses. And Ivanka. The meeting lasted just over half an hour, meaning a tremendous amount was accomplished for women.
The Mexican president was supposed to meet with Trump in Washington. But after Trump insisted, yet again, that Mexico is expected to pay (up to $22 billion) for a wall Mexico doesn't want, the Mexican leader threw up his hands and canceled the meeting. Even after that, Trump threatened to send soldiers across the border after "bad hombres." Just joking! Mexico is our third-largest trading partner.
Australia's prime minister didn't even book a plane. Trump managed to offend him so mightily on the phone by saying he didn't want refugees the U.S. had already agreed with the United Nations to take, there was no question of a personal visit anytime soon.
And all this time, nothing but praise for Vladimir Putin, a former KGB agent who kills opponents and has just broken a Reagan-era arms control treaty against deploying land-based cruise missiles. So what, asked Trump, is the U.S. itself so innocent? Really?
Trump supporters say the chaos in the White House is a result of his still-incomplete Cabinet. (Democrats argue the nominees didn't supply required paperwork.) But Trump's national security team leaders are in place. They were, at least, until the man famous for crying, "You're fired," fired his national security adviser for losing his trust. Trump then blamed the firing on the "fake media."
Secretary of State Rex Tillerson's deputy of choice was turned down by the White House for not being a loyal Trump supporter the moment Trump announced his presidential run. Hundreds of key administration jobs aren't filled yet, in large measure because personal loyalty to Trump is the major test.
We are left to wonder why the Trump campaign kept contacting Russian intelligence. Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., just shakes his head in dismay, saying there is "significant dysfunction" in Trump's national security apparatus.
Meanwhile, Iran is still "on notice" for its own defiant missile test, but nobody is paying much notice except for Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, who raced to the White House. He wanted to see if he could change our Mideast policy by talking quietly to Trump's son-in-law, who often acts like the only adult in the room. Hey, for some leaders, it's any port in the storm.
The rest of you? Bide your time.